An interesting concept with a variety of imaginative/artistic shots. Mise en scene is generally good (use of lighting, costume, props particularly stands out). The main issue is ordering of events and exposition (story telling) details to give the action some context. Consider the following as a way of improving/enhancing your work:
• Production logo required at start • Font of credits needs rethinking – experiment more and note conventions for your genre • Title – could this appear earlier? Feels awkwardly placed in the action • Try experimenting with filters on your church scenes – feels too bright • Sound needs to be carefully considered – lacking a flow and connection to action • Ordering of scenes needs to be carefully considered – think about what you are trying to show the audience. For example, can it be church, scrapbook, chase, capture, death? • Chase sequence needs to be cut quicker to help create excitement/tension • Splice cuts feel a little confusing where they are placed. Think about why you want to use them. • Sound needs more consideration in the torture/death scene. Sound can create something more horrific/shocking for the audience • Consider a voice over from the killer to tie the sequence together. It could also help with the exposition mentioned earlier – e.g. why is he at a grave? Why does he capture and kill this guy?
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An interesting concept with a variety of imaginative/artistic shots. Mise en scene is generally good (use of lighting, costume, props particularly stands out). The main issue is ordering of events and exposition (story telling) details to give the action some context. Consider the following as a way of improving/enhancing your work:
• Production logo required at start
• Font of credits needs rethinking – experiment more and note conventions for your genre
• Title – could this appear earlier? Feels awkwardly placed in the action
• Try experimenting with filters on your church scenes – feels too bright
• Sound needs to be carefully considered – lacking a flow and connection to action
• Ordering of scenes needs to be carefully considered – think about what you are trying to show the audience. For example, can it be church, scrapbook, chase, capture, death?
• Chase sequence needs to be cut quicker to help create excitement/tension
• Splice cuts feel a little confusing where they are placed. Think about why you want to use them.
• Sound needs more consideration in the torture/death scene. Sound can create something more horrific/shocking for the audience
• Consider a voice over from the killer to tie the sequence together. It could also help with the exposition mentioned earlier – e.g. why is he at a grave? Why does he capture and kill this guy?